Fair Weather Fans Are Unamerican

Posted: April 21, 2011 in Basketball, Fandom, Football
Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Just what the hell do I mean by this?

Well, I’ll tell you, because I love to write. Although we haven’t always lived up to the standard, America has traditionally been about rooting for the underdog. If you don’t have a vested interest in the outcome of a game – that is, it isn’t your home team’s interest that’s on the line – you always find yourself rooting for the upset.

Look at college basketball. The NCAA tournament’s major selling point is the existence of upsets. It adds a level of “I don’t know what’s going to happen” that makes everyone happy, but this ultimately arose from our love of the underdog.

Look at the NFL. Parity was brought in for the sole purpose of creating exactly that uncertainty, giving every NFL market a reason for investing faith in their team. It’s always good economically to play on American values.

Now let’s get *really* nerdy. Let’s look at our patent system. For its entire existence, our patent system was based on a “first to invent” standard that makes proving your case in court very difficult. The rest of the world has a “first to file” system and thought we were crazy for not having one. Our rationale? A “first to invent” system favors the little guy over the big corporate machine. We recently bowed to international pressure and switched, but it literally took centuries for us to do that.

You’re a Bunch of Jackholes

So, what does that say about someone who chooses their “home team” based solely on the fact that they have a winning record? You do the math.

While I was in law school, I met a rather annoying New Yorker who was a Dallas Cowboys fan based on having grown up in the 80s. He provided the counter argument: “I strive for quality!” First, dumbass, you aren’t responsible in the least for their success other than, perhaps, the purchase of a Cowboys jersey. (I never saw him wear one.) Second, that’s not the way Americans are supposed to think. The fact that they (at that point) were the team to beat is exactly why you should want them beaten. I find it not the least bit surprising that this guy was a fair weather fan and a very obnoxious person. They tend to go hand in hand.

Dallas Sucks

Dallas Sucks

Of course, Dallas Cowboys fans are the most notorious for being fair weather fans. I have no problem whatsoever with a Dallas native rooting for the Cowboys. I still hate you guys, but I respect you. Anyone from Texas generally, or even from a neighboring state without a pro football team (e.g., Oklahoma) also gets a pass, and reasonably so. However, if you walk up to the average Dallas fan, try asking them the following questions:

1. Are you from Dallas?
2. Have you ever lived in Dallas?
3. Have you ever been to Dallas for anything other than a Dallas game?
4. Can you spell Dallas?

Don’t be surprised if they answer no to each of those questions. My favorite Redskins fan T-Shirt simply asks the reader, “Have you ever even BEEN to Dallas?”

And by the way, I’m consistent. When someone tells me they’re a Redskins fan, I always ask in what area near DC they grew up. When they answer, for example, El Paso, Texas, I get a bit miffed. I’m willing to accept the “foreign” support, but they’re definitely viewed as second class citizens in our community. I hope the true Cowboys fans view non-Texan Cowboys fans the same way.

Wrapping It up

Some of you have legitimate reasons for liking a team other than your home team. For example, some of you might say, “My parents were fans of some other team.” If that’s true, I can accept that. No problem. All I’m saying is that if the basis of your loyalty is to side with the winning team (whether you admit it or not), you’re rejecting one of the principles on which this country was founded.

And you’ve earned my disgust.

Follow me on Twitter @MMADork
Follow the Washington Redskins on Twitter @RedskinsDotCom
Don’t follow the Dallas Cowboys on Twitter @dallascowboys

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